THE PROMISE OF CHANGE
I am now living unpeacefully and disturbed; in an ocean of hows and whys; in a community surrounded by fears and uncertainty; in a nation blinded by the promise of change.
The photo below is a testimony of the change we all want to achieve. It is an evidence not just of our battle for change, but of great despair within each one of us to start a safer and better place to live in.
She is Jhen, putting colors to the face of her destroyed mother, Jennifer. Also known by many as "Peng", Jennifer is described as a loving and caring family woman, and a good and helpful friend to everyone.
Peng is a victim of the promise of change. She is a victim of dying goodness in the community, and of heinous killings meant to erradicate people allegedly engaged on illegal drug trade.
Looking back, months ago she's been arrested due to alleged involvement with drugs in a search operation. However, her case was dismissed and she was kept out of the police's custody. She flew then like a dove freed from a steel cage. She started a brand new life with her husband and daughter.
Because she had a case, although dismissed due to doubtful operation, lack of evidence and posting negative result on drug test, she was convinced to surrender to the police. Jhen, although doubtful, accompanied her mom as Peng decided to voluntarily surrender for safety purposes, July 18.
August 4, sixteen days after she surrendered, Peng was shot to death by still unidentified riding in tandem at Processional Street, Zone IV, Bantay, Ilocos Sur. Four fired cartridges and a deformed slug were recovered by the SOCO at the crime scene.
Police officers knew Peng, her joker identity, her youthful and joyful spirit. Policemen knew the goodness within this woman. Even them doesn't know a motive relative to her execution.
Her family decided not to pursue for autopsy examination, to preserve her cadaver as her sexy and curvacious shape when she was still breathing and kicking alive.
Now, Jhen finds her mom as beautiful as ever, sleeping inside her coffin with her favorite make-up and lipstick shades on. Lying peacefully, smiling as she knows her soul shall enter the heaven.
The best mom in the world for Jhen already left her. Jhen knows she didn't only lost her mom, but also her twin and her bestfriend. Jhen knows she must face the next days without seeing her ever loved mom physically. Jhen knows she'll only have her mom's photos and memories to keep reminding her Peng is still around, with her. Jhen knows she has to be stronger, she knows she must have the strength more than she ever had before.
Peng is dead. The most wonderful woman for everyone who knows her considers her death their lost. The coolest mom in the world is gone forever.
I was there when the police processed the crime scene. I was there when Jhen arrived at the hospital and learned about what happened to her mom. I was there hugging her so tight, sympathizing with her grief when the doctor said, "she's gone". I was there when the hospital personnel transferred her corpse from the emergency room to the morgue. I was there when police officers talked to her and her dad, trying to get more information to help solve the case. I was there at the funeral parlor when she requested to put her mom's make-up for the last time. I was there all the time for a very good friend of mine.
I was there not just for Jhen, but also for Daddy Palits and more importantly for Mommy Peng. Yes, I consider her as my own mom because she did a great job, back then when we're cuddling and sleeping together with some other friends at their place. Yes, I was there because I also lost her, whom I consider my mom, my friend. I was there because I also have same grief as Jhen's.
As I write this, images of her keeps flashing. When she joined us up for vacation at Baguio last December 2011, she was fun to be with and I must say she's the coolest of her age. When she put herself on to protect and defend me from my attackers, I knew she was a strong and a fighter woman. When I buy her bestselling shanghai, she compliments it with jokes like I also paid for it, I knew this joker made me laugh.
I wrote this not to gain fame by doing a great piece. I wrote this to express the feelings and thoughts I have. I wrote this to condemn the death of this wonderful human being. I wrote this to share Jhen and I's experience of losing someone we love. I wrote this to inform everyone how great Mommy Peng was.
I wrote this not because I personally know the victims of this wrong doing. I wrote this not because I consider Mommy Peng as my own mom. I wrote this because this has to be written. I wrote this because it has to be read by everyone. I wrote this to share to everyone the feeling of our lost. I wrote this to open the minds of the Filipinos about what's happening in our country. I wrote this to let everyone know that Mommy Peng's death is not the death of our justice system. Most importantly, I wrote this because it's the only thing I know to wake up the goodness and conscience within us and together, we can make a stand to condemn illicit acts like killing.
Mommy Peng is not the only victim of atrocious killings in the Philippines. Extrajudicial killing, summary execution or any other terms we use to describe such act, it's bottomline is it's inhumane, vicious and pitiless.
Hundreds have been killed, be it true they're involved to crimes and drugs, is this what they deserve? Is this what we really reciprocate to change? Is this what we wanted to hear on radio or watch on television? Is this what we are telling to our children and our children's children?
They say the only permanent thing on earth is change, but if change means lives should be sacrificed, I'd rather go back in time and stay there forever.
All men, good or bad have the right to be given chances, even if it takes a million of them. But let me reiterate, what if the person is innocent? Or if the person really does something unlawful, what if he did it to provide security for his family? Who are we to judge and get their lives? We are not God!
I wrote my thought because I felt like it is best with the letters.
I wrote because what happened to Mommy Peng might also happen to anybody else.
I wrote to seek justice not only for her but for all the victims.
I wrote because injustice at all levels must be stopped.
I wrote not just my thought but also my heart and soul.
In memory of the late
JENNIFER PAZ PARRA
Oct. 20, 1976- Aug. 4, 2016
Photo credit: Jenn Paz, victim's daughter
This was Peng's Facebook account:
https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.parra.39108