do you remember the first time you love dead man and the first time you masterbrate?

Bernkastel

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"In the line of Fire". Near the start of the movie Dylan McDermot's character is being suffocated with a plastic bag and he's whining and almost shrieking. Very nice scene. That was probably the first time for me. I must have been what 12, 13?
 
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casualsquirter

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it's not something i ever thought about until i came across this forum! i like the feel of breath control and wanking with a belt round my neck, hooked over the door so was looking online for self hanging pics and found this forum only to find the pics and discussions are a major turn on!
 

dead astronaut

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I remember I was about 12 years-old. I was watching a movie at home in which a boy, who was about my age at the time, was accidentally shot in the chest during a hunting trip with is Oncle. I clearly remember he was wearing a blue down jacket and a white turtleneck with a zip front (those turtleneck were very popular for boy at that time). On the next scene, his Oncle unzips his vest to look at the bullet wound. Crimson blood was running down on his white turtleneck while the poor boy moaned in pain. His Oncle took him in his arm and brought him into a remote cabin. No cell phone at that time, so the Oncle tried to administrate first aid to him (just some few bandage placed over the bullet hole directly on his turtleneck), but the poor boy died quietly some time after.

I don’t remember the rest of the movie because I went back to my room to put on a zip front turtleneck that I had to go skiing with my parent. I put on my winter jacket and start acting like I was the boy in the movie. Then I masturbate and came on my turtleneck. Then I fall asleep still wearing my turtleneck. As far as I can remember, it was just great.
 

Will Scott

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about thirteen, late at night after everyone in the house had gone to bed, in front of the TV watching a sword and sandal movie were a hot young guy was spread eagle over a pit of flaming coals....I had watched in the afternoon with a raging hardon and saw it was going to be repeated at 2 AM.....after that it was almost non stop, jacking, I mean....with more and more fantasies of heroes being tortured.....and the wrest is history.
 

Lycanthrope

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Probably around 12 yo when I saw this news footage of a dead swimmer in his speedo
 

gibing

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Most likely i was about twelve and looked at old crime scene magazines
 

pierrepju

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My first time, as I remember, was at cinema watching a movie, of a spaghetti western scene where a US cavalry soldiers escort a payroll wagon and die annihilated by bandoleros. The dead soldiers was stripped naked and left on the ground only in their long johns and socks. They was so cute in their uniforms and tall boots!
 

JacobFuller

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The first time was when I was maybe 10-11 watching Cowboys and Indians movies. It also happened when I watched swords and sandals films. When the men were killed something inside me tingled in my loins and I felt drawn to the scene on TV. I may have even gotten semi-erect. It wasn't until many years later, well into adulthood that I explored dead bodies of men online and those memories came back to me. I jerk off now to dead soldiers, POW scenes, and men being arrowed and shot. I can't get enough of it.
 

necrocream

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I started jacking around 9 or 10 (but had "filth" erotic responses when rolling around the moldy corners of my basement as early as 5 or 6, but didn't know what those senastions were. but I knew to keep them secret).

I think my first awareness of death-sex urges began when I saw those crime mags in the drug store. I realized almost right away that this was sexual and that these magazines were for men who liked it (although my concept of sex itself was still pretty theoretical).

Around puberty or maybe a little earlier, I saw a Time Magazine Vietnam photo of a young soldier who'd burned to death, his face frozen in a tortured scream. I was horrified by it, but also knew my horror was laced with dark pleasure. I felt bad for him, but couldn't deny my arousal.

The urge really kicked in for me at age 16 when I started creating my own snuff porn, staying up late at night, sketching pic after pic of muscular, hung, hairy men slicing each other to pieces, ejacutating as they died and killed, beheadings, dismemberment, disemboweling. Slaughter orgies with everybody cumming.

I loved it. Still do. And I always liked secretly being "that kind of guy."

The first time ever to fantasize about the dead wasn't until I was about 21 or 22. Now I can't reach orgasm unless I am fantasizing about death.
The graduation into true manhood: when your realize your sexuality cannot be free of death and death images and visualization. And embracing it fully as healthy and natural.
 

BloodFullOfPain

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Both when I was about 13 years old.
 

trekeyus

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I have been masturbating for so long that I can hardly remember my first experience but I was likely around 8-10. I was obsessed with violent porn and hentai. I knew from an early age that I was an aquaphile and loved watching guys and girls underwater and fantasizing about them drowning. The first real gore vid I ever saw I downloaded from some p2p program back in the day. It was the video of that one American that got his neck slit years ago. I had seen countless fake gore videos before that and was obsessed with the various videos of guys and girls drowning,hanging,suffocating,etc. My favorite fake hanging seen was das hause with the guy hanging with the other guy saying die boi die. My favorite fake drowning video was and still is Casting Call part 1 with Maggie produced by none other then AF(Aqua Fantasies inc) before they closed
 

callmecaleb

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I was six and had a comic book showing two very muscular Indians wearing loincloths and fighting. One shoved his knife into the ribs of the other.
I didn't cum but experienced the closest thing to cumming that a six-year-old can experience. My groin and my mind exploded that day. I was on my way to becoming the Caleb you all know today.
 
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