Mostly victim here, because I love the thrill of being made totally helpless (either tied up or KO'd) and then subjected to pain and fear. I like to be bagged, strangled, tortured, threatened with knives... Havn't gone further than that in real life, yet. I am top enough to enjoy choke hold wrestling, mutual KO games, and topping in some S&M scenes.
(If you ever get to Tahoe and that sounds good to you, send me a PM.)