Happiness is so Transient

[Meatpie]

Last year I had a hairy boyfriend who let me do anything with his body, suck his amazing hot toes, put him stark naked on a table and strangle him.

I turned the kitchen into my own private mortuary.

At noon I will put my naked hairy boyfriend on the kitchen table and photograph him.

In the evening, I would invite guests and have family dinner on the same table.

I was permanently hard, we went crazy biking together, we got drunk, I fucked other guys, I had a crazy time without even realizing that I was actually quite happy at the time compared to what I have now...

All this is gone, my boyfriend got sick with liver failure, his dad had a heart attack, his mom was left unemlployed and fighting with diabetes.

I had to move with granny and we got seperated...

What a sad situation, happiness is so transient.

In the end we are left with absolutely nothing no matter what happy intense moments you experienced we all end up as tragedies.

We can't retreive our happiness and enjoy it again, like we can do with pics on the PC drive.

I wonder what happens with our past? Is it stored somewhere or lost forever?

Currently there is no scientific theory that allows for time travel into our past.

I woud like to go back and change things.

Instead we are all headed for doom.

One day computers will become powerful enough people will be able to store their emotions, their happy moments and relive them again when they feel sad and lonely.

 

[metalmachine]

Who would not ever turn back?

 

[yalada]

Although happiness is indeed transient, living in the past does not bring happiness. Longing for days gone by is a sad thing. Yes that moment was bliss. There will be more such moments. The human condition is such that we must celebrate those times not long for what can not be recaptured but embrace the new happiness yet to come. After each rain storm comes the sun and if we are lucky the rainbow. Yes life is hard at times. If it were always easy how would we know to cherish the really wonderful times. Do i sometimes long for days gone by.. of course, would i go back. No. I like the me i see in the mirror. That person is a culmination of all the good and the bad things that have happened. Take heart MP and remember it is hard to see how beutiful the future can be if we are constantly looking over our shoulder at the past.

 

[Meatpie]

Interesting thoughts as always, thanks for sharing.

You are probably right, I should learn to accept life as it is and not linger in the past, but it is hard.

I miss my boyfriend, we had arguments but he was a good guy and at the time I didn't realize it, I took him for granted and sometimes behaved badly towards him.

When things got fucked I realized how transient everything really is.

I have to call him and meet up again for a drink.

Once I asked him why he is still with me when he knows what a sick fuck I am really am.

He said, "You are fucked yes but you are also cute and make me rock hard".



I used him as my toy boy, I made him do things for me that were really sickening, like once I wrapped him in nylon naked and dragged him around like he was a corpse in a morgue.

Horrbile.

We came hard yes but when I pulled out a knife just for play he bailed out.