Getting horned up for a little New Years Eve self hang! I fine cigar and a few drinks and I start to get into it. I have a real noose around my neck right now and can see myself in the mirror when I want. Sometimes I'll secure the noose and get up on a sturdy chair to tease myslef a little. What if I just put my foot up on the back and push real hard? It's tempting! But doing that I'm also aware that with a few drinks in me, I could loose my balance. In that case I'm telling myself to just keep my hands down and let it happen. So far it hasn't and the chair never breaks on me...yet.
So then I'm good and hard for it and get down and go to the counterweight setup I use to almost hang, getting myself a good strangling stroke! It's safe enough. It's set up so if I'm losing it, I'll let go and the weights drop and I'm out of it. It's hot though. I'll strangle myself, almost like I'm being electrocuted and can't let go, I'm so intent on getting off! I've fallen before at the end and now have some padded mats down just in case I'm really going out when I let go.