Let me continue.
CDG stimulates me with its videos and photos. Especially videos. Of men having their arms cut off. Faces skinned off their skulls. Knives in their naked bellies. Machetes slicing their bodies. Blood spurting. As I watch breathlessly, in ecstasy, panting and spurting.
CDG provides a canvas on which I can express my deepest, most primitive cravings and needs. I can release these through my writing, through stories and conversations with other members, with no hesitation or embarrassment. I am comfortable with my CDG brothers (and occasional sisters, yes). I can even confide with some my deepest fantasies. Fantasies of degradation and pain and death.
With CDG brothers, I feel kinship. I am comfortable. I am me.