I went back to the morgue today

Meatpie

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I had thrown all morgue documents into the dustbin but in the morning I had a nervous breakdown, I so want to work in a morgue.

So bad I can't stand it.

I should have never been allowed to see real naked dead bodies on slabs.

It is so hot, so insanely hot it can drive every necro insane.

So I took the documents from the dustbin and ironed them.

I went to the morgue...but as I neared the building I got so worked up, so fucked up in the head I just passed by...

I imagined all the rotters at the basement, the smell how they were leaking on the floor and I had to step into this shit....

I got nauseous again, I guess my body tries to protect me from this horrific place.

But the lust...the lust for dead bodies is so strong.

The smell of a fresh dead body of a man is out of this world.

The hairy chest cut open, the cold feet, the blue toes, the open mouth...

the cocks exposed and flipped on one side, the legs spread as the guys are carelessly dumped on strechers...

I loved it all.

Hosing the hairy chests of the dudes with cold water after they've been stiched up, blood pooling under their asses.

And how they had propped them up...three neighbouring tables, one naked dead guy near another, then another and another one!

All needing attention!

All propped up and silent.

And down the elevator more dead dudes awaiting autopsy!

Undressed naked but they sill haven't been "opened" to use a morticans jargon.

And whats even more insane is that I went into a room with 150 bodies and it was deathly silent, an erie silence, you could only hear the fans buzzing in the distance, trying to get rid of the smell.

I want to go back and work there but because the rotters make me so sick I can't even enter the building.

I just froze at the entrance. Couldn't make a single step. I don't know how I went the first time, maybe because I had no idea what was hidden at the basement of that building.

:sm (41):

See how fucked I am?

See how bad necro can become, how it can fuck you up in no time? My mind locked up when I went. Is this a way to protect me? Or just fear? Fear of the rotters? brown melting bodies with no face, no legs, no arms, no head, just a pile of brown stinky rotting shit.

You should be happy your obsessions are not as severe as mine and you don't have insane urges like I do.

I spend 2 hours around the morgue building, and I still couldn't get the courage to enter and sign my papers.

:(

See? See how bad I am?
 
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