All if these responses have been fascinating to read.
I am female, so you can take my reply or leave it, but maybe it'll offer some insight.
I was molested by a family member and shortly after, a favorite aunt of mine died and I started really wondering about death and whether or not it hurt. I also happened upon two neighbors who were watching the Texas chainsaw massacre and I sneaked in and watched it. I was really excited about what I saw and wondered if one day I could kill the family member who molested me, if I could get one over on him in some way.
I found a few dead things in the woods around that time and would put them in ant piles to see what happened. I found a lot of peace in death and the simple extremes of nature. The woods also hid me from my abusive family members and let me fantasize about finding a dead body, or where I would put a guy if I killed him.
Anyway, I would never act out that stuff, it's always been a fantasy though.
I am female, so you can take my reply or leave it, but maybe it'll offer some insight.
I was molested by a family member and shortly after, a favorite aunt of mine died and I started really wondering about death and whether or not it hurt. I also happened upon two neighbors who were watching the Texas chainsaw massacre and I sneaked in and watched it. I was really excited about what I saw and wondered if one day I could kill the family member who molested me, if I could get one over on him in some way.
I found a few dead things in the woods around that time and would put them in ant piles to see what happened. I found a lot of peace in death and the simple extremes of nature. The woods also hid me from my abusive family members and let me fantasize about finding a dead body, or where I would put a guy if I killed him.
Anyway, I would never act out that stuff, it's always been a fantasy though.