dsyn

Forum Regular
Joined
Mar 24, 2009
Messages
85
Location
United States
The rope I used broke, so I figure that's a sign enough that I should just live it out.


And no, my parents do not know that I actually tried.
 
Trying hanging yourself can damage your neck organs if it is not successful so even doing it as a joke can have serious consequences.

I doubt you did it anyway. Where were you we missed you.
 
Trying hanging yourself can damage your neck organs if it is not successful so even doing it as a joke can have serious consequences.

I doubt you did it anyway. Where were you we missed you.


Where did I say it was a joke?

You doubt I did it? So I'd have to have died for their to be proof?

I was and am going through a rough time in my life, I had attempted suicide and missed the man of my life very much. Checking to see if this forum was back up was not exactly top priority for me.

However, I'm glad to see you all have kept your forum going.

I won't be here as much.. my life is really going hay-wire right now.
 
Like you Meatpie i can not make up my mind yet if Dysn is for real.
If you are being honest dysn, then talk to us it will help, we know what you are going through. Self harm never was and never will be the answer.
If you are making this stuff up and taking the piss, then fuck off and die slowly from cock rot. Don't try and fuck with our minds and emotions , we have ways of finding you and will seriously fuck up your body.
 
Like you Meatpie i can not make up my mind yet if Dysn is for real.
If you are being honest dysn, then talk to us it will help, we know what you are going through. Self harm never was and never will be the answer.
If you are making this stuff up and taking the piss, then fuck off and die slowly from cock rot. Don't try and fuck with our minds and emotions , we have ways of finding you and will seriously fuck up your body.



This is ridiculous. I attempt suicide and I'm supposed to prove myself?

And then on top of that, I get threatened?

I once considered this community to be civil, and understanding, but I sincerely doubt it at this point.


In fact, I might as well delete my account at this point, since apparently me attempting suicide was fake, and no one really seems to give a shit. Oh wait, this resembles my life with my parents and friends and well. I don't think I'll ever get this feeling of hopelessness to go away.
 
Sad if you really tried to do it. Obviously we give a shit since we post relplies in your threads.

Man if you really are suicidal, there are professionals who can help you.

You need to talk to someone about your feelings.

And btw darkside is right. If you disappear we have a way to check if you really did it, that would be proof yes.

And the mods have experience, as we already had a member who said he was gonna kill himself on the forum.

We didn't believe him at first; then we learnt he tried to shoot himself in the head.

It took us a month to find out.

If you do it there will be a short news article about you so there are ways.

Killing yourself would hurt your boyfriend and family very much and scar them for life.

Can you tell us the reason why you have come to this drastic measure?
 
Come on, Daniel !

Come on, Daniel....you know that we care about you..do you think I wrote this shortly before 1 AM on April 15th (ten minutes after you posted your comments) ... and tried so hard to help you..if I did not care??

Along with the rest of us, too ?
http://cutedeadguys.1stfreehosting.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2372

Daniel, I was way too harsh to you at first, and I am sorry. PLEASE though know that I care about you...and YES, I truly have been very worried about you, man, since you posted this. I could not understand what such a hot stud with such a great future, so intelligent and sensitive, would harm yourself in any way !

Daniel, privately contact me on here, send me a message, man..let's talk, OK?

I care, man, I CARE....so there, proved you wrong...because I really care, I know when someone threatens suicuide IT is to be taken very seriously, I BELIEVE YOU that you attempted this, and I WANT to help you, Daniel....if not me, then someone else, click on the link I gave you in my post and find help.

BUT know that I am willing to talk to you, help you...and HEY...I DO CARE...and am VERY HAPPY you are BACK with us !!

I am so happy you are STILL with us all, and that that fucking rope BROKE!
 
Last edited:
Arrow does indeed care, he has helped a lot of people on the internet, including the admin of this forum, pull from a fucking crisis and get over depression and suicide thoughts.

We all have crises, no doubt about that, but killing yourself when you are young and healthy and have a home and a family is really brutal.

:sm (20):

I still don't get the exacr reason as to why you decided to do it, and why did you choose hanging?

Its painful and unless you drop from a few metres it will take you up to two minutes to loose consciousness.

This is torture Daniel, don't perform this on yourself.

:sm (41):
 
Daniel !
Ok i belive you, i just needed more of a reaction from you to gauge wether you were being sincere, sorry for having to be such a cunt, but i am a bit overly suspicious of some of the newish members on this site.
People here do care and do try to give advice and the benifit of thier experiance.
Right the apology and explination over.
Listen up. Suicide is NOT the answer a lot of us have been thier and got the t-shirt and it's fucking wrong and achieves fuck all.
Going to a shrink won't help either, been thier done that and it's crap
the harsh reality is you are who you are. Poeple will ttry to change you, you may try to change yourself don't bother it will only screw your mind.
Sounds like your family do care about you they just have trouble comming to terms with it and understanding your needs, you need to understand thier confusion as much as they need to understand your needs.
You said you have a boyfriend, how do you think he would have felt if you had killed yourself?
I am afraid you are still very young and still have a lot to learn, but belive me things do get better. Just give it time.If your boyfriend is the right one for you then you will find a way to continue the relationship, weather it means only occasional vists at holidays untill you can aford to move in together. Or if it means leaving home now to be together,concider this option very carefully running away together now may seem like the big romantic gesture, but be realistic, where will you live, how would you survive, this sort of drastic action may turn your family against you and i get the feeling that's not what you realy want.
The first thing to deal with is put all thoughts of self arm out of your head it's not the fucking answer, never was, never will be, we have all had friends who have done this and the one question that is alway asked after the person has killed themselves is WHY, friends and family always ask, Why didn't they talk to me, Why didn't they ask for help, Why didn't they tell me how unhappy they were.
Reality is harsh, but it also focuses the mind.
If you realy want something then work at it don't give in and NEVER give up hope.
It's only worth having if it's worth fighting for.
Set your sights on what and who you want and put all your efforts in to getting them, use the energy you were putting in to your suicidal and depressive thoughts in to getting what you need, I know it sounds patronising saying you are young , and i don't mean it to, but i am afraid that's a fact of life, belive me you have many more ups and downs to come in life, with luck there will be more highs than lows, but you have to work at it. We are all here for you .
YOU ARE NOT ALONE .
BEFORE FINDING THIS SITE I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY GAY NECRO IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD NOW I KNOW I AM NOT.
So i am neither alone or sick in the head. and neither are you!
Get out thier and start living and shagging, if those around you can't or won't accept you for who you realy are then find people who do. It won't be easy but life was never ment to be easy.
Chears Darkside
 
I appreciate the compassion, really I do.

I think the reason I tried to do it was because I felt so alone here, my boyfriend lives 2 hours away and is the only one outside of the internet that really seems to be on my side...

I'm not sure if I really want to contact any organization for suicide help, since I don't really want people to know that I've tried. My boyfriend doesn't even know.

However I have contacted an organization here in oklahoma... they are like a support group for gay teens... and they give you advice and stuff I guess.. hopefully that will help some?

I'm trying to not give up hope.. really I am.. but damn it's hard to keep on trying..


And.. after some extensive reading I think I was mis-diagnosed... I don't think I suffer from severe depression but rather 'soft bi-polar disorder".. it apparently is much like bi-polar disorder but a lighter case of it... affects nearly 10 percent of the population... might explain why my meds for depression only seem to make me MORE depressed... who knows though..


EDIT: And the reason I tried hanging was because it's the only real way I had without alerting my parents.. and I figured it'd be over quick if it cleanly broke my neck... I hopped off my bathroom counter which is about 4.5 feet in the air.. but the thin cord I use broke where the knot was (I'm not too good at tying them) .. plus i think i damaged the pole above my bathroom mirror i tied it to..
 
Last edited:
I know a lot of the guys here are very intelegent and like to read up on what they think their illness may be, for sum it helps for others i'm not so sure, i think sometimes it just makes matters worse. Be carefull what you read and what you choose to belive is relevant to you, sometimes ignorance is the better option.
Only you know what is realy bothering you, so by my way of thinking only you have the power to sort it out, advice and opinions from others can help clarify your thoughts but i'm afraid the bottom line is - it's realy up to you.
Holy shit i'm starting to sound like an old fucking agony ant, thats it i'm off for the night, going down the pub to get half pissed and see whats around for shaggin.
 
Last edited:
It's good to hear you're not dead. Welcome back.
 
I don't think I suffer from severe depression but rather 'soft bi-polar disorder".. it apparently is much like bi-polar disorder but a lighter case of it...

There is nothing "soft" about commiting suicide.

I fail to see a good reason why you want to do it - your parents don't understand you and your boyfriend lives away?

I think all this can be managed by simply talking to the people.

So they diagnosed you with severe depression? Do you take your meds regularly?

Bipolar is more devastating and harder to treat as far as I know.
 
Ok, when I read yer postings I see you need help. Alot of it!

Daniel bud, I tried suicide aswell, it is not the answer, nor is it the way to solve your problems. It may look like it's easy, and solves all your problems, but it is not.

Your parents can be a source of help, as can your school counselor, your friends and even we can be of help.

If you do want to talk, send me a PM, Skype or Yahoo IM!!

Remember, we are here for all to help!!
 
After much consideration, I decided to let you all know how and why I tried to kill myself.

I was 24, lost my job and also my income. I was really down, my friends all ignored me, harted me and my parents where also not supportive, they said it was all my fault and I was stupid and horrible.
Even worse, I got involved into some bad car crashes which hacked into my savings and finances, all bad news on top of each other.
Eventually I had enough, could not sleep, could not eat, nothing mattered to me anymore. Also the fact that the weather was bad helped a bit.
I could not get a job, I was too old and did not had relevant experiences.
I was horrified and even more depressed when my parents decided to charge rent for living with them.
So one day, I decided that my life was a failure. No one cared if I went dead, I thought to myself. So I went looking for ways to end it.

Fortunately, I snapped out of it before it was too late. I found some reserve of inner strength and a voice of reason stating that I had to fight my demons and bad feelings, instead of running away from them. I decided to seek help, also took a self course of psychiatry and became stronger after some time. They showed me no matter how deep the abyss is, you can climb out of it!
 
omg. This is unbelievable.

So thats why you reacted like this when I started posting about my problems?

I am really sorry to hear all this, never knew the whole story but I am glad you finally decided to share it with us.

I am in the exact same situation right now. It is such a devastating feeling being unable to find a job, I too feel like a total failure.

And my family simply don't care. Can you imagine my dad doesn't even call to ask if I need anything. Mom calls from time to time but we can't talk. She doesn't know what to say.

It is amazing you managed to find a way out of a bad situation and you have achieved your current living standard. And you are independent from your parents.

I am very proud of you really.

It is easy to be weak and turn to suicide but it takes will power to fight and struggle for a better life.

So Daniel I hope you read this and see that our lives too are not all roses and that we all have difficult moments.

Don't do anything stupid man.

Entilzha and Arrow have more experience than us and can help us out pull of this crises.
 
I hope he still is here and not tried to do anything stupid!!

dsyn, if you are here, let us know!!
 
I am worried to. Hope he posts again soon.
 
Back
Top